Inclinations

I am inclined to write a poem, not because it is easy but because I express myself better through poetry. Often I have been told that even the pieces that aren’t poems, read like poems. I’m sure it has something to do with the rhythm of my writing. I’m sure it has something to do with my writer’s voice.

I am inclined to write about the plight of women. Women are still fighting for equality , women are still fighting for a seat at the corporate table, women are still fighting internal battles that have left scars on their souls. Women are still fighting systems that are actively trying to exclude them. Women are still fighting.

I am inclined to write about my identity and other identities. I constantly write about my identity and my experiences as a Coloured person because I am constantly grappling with it. I am in a constant state of questioning who I am,what I am, how I fit in, if I fit in and if I want to fit in.

I am inclined to write about sexual violence and how people still aren’t grasping the gravity and magnitude of it. Remove the statistics and remember that behind those statistics are people who never asked for it. Behind those statistics are people who did not give their continuous consent. Behind those statistics are people you know.

I am inclined to write about university and what it has taught me beyond academia, in conjunction with academia and in contradiction to academia. It has molded and groomed me beyond my expectations but it has also made me more critical of this space that I am and its impact on other students.

I am inclined to write about adulthood and how nobody could have prepared me for it. As young as I am, there are challenges I have faced that I never imagined I would but also that I never imagined I would survive. I cannot be broken by what the women before me have built.

I am inclined to write about this uncertainty that I am forcing myself to revel in. I am in a state of perpetual uncertainty and instead of allowing it to consume me, I have decided to embrace it. I have decided to embrace not knowing what I will do next year and where I will end up. But I have also decided to be happy , irrespective of that.

I am inclined to write about love in all of its forms and in all of the ways I have experienced it. I am a hopeless romantic and I do have people hidden in my words and echoing in my prayers. It is in them and in love that my faith in humanity finds its place of comfort and rests eternally.

I am inclined to write about all of these things for as long as I possibly can because it is in writing about them that I start making sense of them. It is in my words that I start to find acceptance. It is in the form that I use, that my thoughts are formed. It is in my inclinations to write, where I rebuild and rediscover myself.

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